Worried Goats

(Sometimes in french)

At the hospital

He only came to annoy him. To nag him into giving the Agency what they need. He doesn’t let himself remember the terror he felt when he saw the car, just as ango was letting the mask done, once more, like he always end s up doing.

Dazai keeps letting himself be trapped into those eyes. Sakaguchi is many things, and most of those he let outside are cold enough to freeze. That cold, rational man who trapped his heart inside and doesn’t let it move for anyone; Dazai honestly hates him.

That’s not Ango, thoguh; it’s just who Ango pretends to be, who ango tries to be, who ango thinks he needs to be. There are too much care in those eyes for Dazai’s hatred to keep going.

The facade was not so strong when they were young. The 19 year old he met was being snotty, but it was endearing in how frail it was. Underneath it, there was a heart beating so firecely it couldn’t be hidden. There wasa fire in that soul, a core of steel Dazai was instantly seduced by. Wrapped into such a fun to tease exterior. THose types - those righteous, passionate people who are so quick to be irritated, they’ve always been Dazai’s favorites.

What happened to the fire in Ango’s soul ? What did those years in teh Division do to him? Was it just time ? When did Ango learn to tame it so well Dazai thought it well and truly gone ?

In the end, if Ango looks at him like that, accepts to help and still looks at him harshly - ah.

He’s falling in love all over again.