Worried Goats

(Sometimes in french)

Arresting Dostoievsky

He’s actually having fun baiting Dostoevsky when he hears the footsteps and his glee turns off.

He sent to the hospital a man who was trying to warn him.

He tried to bribe him with recovery and he accepted even fully knowing how he ended injurder.

He doesn’t feel guilty. He wanted to do worse. But they are going to have to work together, now, won’t they? He’ll have to work with Chuuya again, and the mafia worked with them, and he asked for the guild’s leader help, and the government is there, and this was Dostoievsky’s opening move but there might be more coming. He doesn’t think arresting him will be enough. So he’ll have to work with him again. So he needs not to do anything like taht again. So he needs to keep the rage in check.

-We’ll take it from there. IS that ok, Dazai-kun.

He can’t look at him. Keeping the anger in check makes this voice hurt him worse. He needs to go, now.

-yeah, yeah, that’s why I called you.

Nonchalance. He won’t let himself be hurt. There’s nothing eft here anyway.

He’s trying so hard no to pay attention to Ango taht he’s too late to stop the soldier from touching Dostoievsky.

Too late. He could have avoided this, if he ahd been focused on the events isntead of avoiding thinking, avoiding feeling.

His heart hurt. If he lets himself, the face that will come to his mind is not the one of his dead friend, but that of the friend he lost. HE can’t afford to.

Once was enoguh. He won’t let himself want something he’s destined to lsoe again, never mind reach for it.